Zeus Avenges Krustian Offense

by Jason Peters on June 15, 2010 · 6 comments <span>Print this article</span> Print this article

in Short

Monroe, OH. In an apparent act of retaliation for offenses against statuary, Zeus, God of the Sky, has destroyed a famous Krustian sculpture.

Earlier today the “King of Kings” statue, also known as “Touchdown Jesus,” was hit by one of Zeus’s famous lightning bolts, in consequence of which it burned to the ground.

“I guess it takes a divine sense of irony to destroy a fiberglass and foam statue outside a place called Solid Rock Church,” said Monroe assistant fire chief Connie Flagration. “You want irony in a god, but this might be going a bit too far.”

Fire fighters are still searching the site, but it appears that no one other than Jesus was lost in the inferno.

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

avatar Artie June 15, 2010 at 11:09 am

“…assistant fire chief Connie Flagration.”

You can get your poetic license yanked for less than this.

avatar Mark Perkins June 15, 2010 at 2:41 pm

How satisfying.

avatar K Hall June 15, 2010 at 8:17 pm

Lets just hope that Mr. Peters doesn’t go writing about my Parish in Harrisburg anytime soon.

avatar D.W. Sabin June 18, 2010 at 4:23 pm

Just a Note from the Pagan quarters, Zeus does not descend to the level of local lightening bolt dispensation. This is the department of Thor, a lesser if not lighter -drinking deity.

avatar WmO'H June 20, 2010 at 6:59 pm

Everyone’s a critic.

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